Vilma Torres

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  www.nydailynews.com/opinions/2007/11/18/2007-11-18_meet - [Cached Version]
  Published on: 11/18/2007    Last Visited: 11/18/2007  

  "There is a shock and disbelief after a homicide because it's an unnatural death," says Vilma Torres, director of the Families of Homicide Victims Program at Safe Horizon, a crime victims' support group.
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  Vilma Torres

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  AMW | Fugitives | Unknown Rory Forehand Killer - [Cached Version]
  Published on: 2/14/2009    Last Visited: 10/26/2009  

  "There is a sense of people coming together and breaking bread," said Vilma Torres, the organization's clinical director.

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  CBS News | Plight Of A Widower | September 10,... - [Cached Version]
  Published on: 9/10/2002    Last Visited: 9/10/2002  

  Vilma Torres, a grief counselor at Safe Horizons, notes, "It's really very difficult because of traditional upbringing of males to be in control, to be confident, the producer...one who can bear the most extraordinary pain and not say ouch."
  
  Safe Horizons has helped hundreds of World Trade Center families with their victims' assistance program.
  
  She says, "We often hear from the male survivor that he's grieving alone.‘I'm keeping it all inside.I'm not telling anybody.'"

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  Families of victims grieve in different ways - [Cached Version]
  Published on: 5/28/2006    Last Visited: 5/28/2006  

  That's especially true with a homicide victim's family, according to Vilma Torres, a clinical director for family of homicide victims programs with Safe Horizons in New York City.
  
  Torres said a homicide victim's family will often think of its grief as a public grief, instead of private.She said they also will attach a stigma to the death because many people will be asking questions about what caused their loved one to die.
  
  "Grief is a unique process," she said.
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  Torres said people need to give family members permission to grieve, and nobody should believe the grieving process is automatically finished in a year.
  
  "I'm not walking in this person's shoes," she said."You can offer tips, but you have to be respective of this person and where they are at in their grieving process.Give them permission to grieve so they don't be come isolated."
  
  Torres and Cody said one of the toughest things is for that family member to take on a new identity.
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  "I don't think it's adjusting, but the word hear many survivors say is adapting," Torres said.
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  Torres said sometimes that place is a memorial or special program.
  
  Overall, Torres said friends of the grieving family need to remember two things.
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  That's especially true with a homicide victim's family, according to Vilma Torres, a clinical director for family of homicide victims programs with Safe Horizons in New York City.
  
  Torres said a homicide victim's family will often think of its grief as a public grief, instead of private.She said they also will attach a stigma to the death because many people will be asking questions about what caused their loved one to die.
  
  "Grief is a unique process," she said.
  ...
  Torres said people need to give family members permission to grieve, and nobody should believe the grieving process is automatically finished in a year.
  
  "I'm not walking in this person's shoes," she said."You can offer tips, but you have to be respective of this person and where they are at in their grieving process.Give them permission to grieve so they don't be come isolated."
  
  Torres and Cody said one of the toughest things is for that family member to take on a new identity.
  ...
  "I don't think it's adjusting, but the word hear many survivors say is adapting," Torres said.
  ...
  Torres said sometimes that place is a memorial or special program.
  
  Overall, Torres said friends of the grieving family need to remember two things.

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  HarlemLIVE Internet Publication By The Youth of NYC - [Cached Version]
  Published on: 7/10/2002    Last Visited: 3/12/2003  

  Vilma Torres, a social worker atPlanned Parenthood's Boro Hall Center in Brooklyn said, "Parents are afraid if they talk about it, theirteens will do it" and teenagers are "concerned about their parents' reactions."
  
  This was definitely true of the teens I spoke with, especially the girls.Most were sure that their parents would disapprove of them being sexually active and that if they raised the subject of sex, their parents would assume they were doing it.
  
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  Torres recommended that you choose a time "when your parents aren't busy or cranky."She also suggested that "if you see a (TV) program about it, discuss it with your parents."And if you are having sex, Torres advised, "Tell your parents before someone else does."
  
  Some of the people I interviewed said they could imagine talking to their parents about sex in thefuture.
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  information," Torres said.First, find someone else you can talk to."Call Planned Parenthood, MountSinai's Adolescent Center, the Door, or get a referral from Youthline," Torres advised.Second, "Make sure it's what you want to do," Torres said.
  
  The right time to have sex is "when you're feeling mature and ready to take on the responsibility.When you want to do it, not because someone is pressuring you to do it," Torres said.And if you do decideyou're ready, she added."Go to a pharmacy to get protection."
  
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  IHT: Sept. 11 families suffer through a year of grief - [Cached Version]
  Published on: 9/12/2002    Last Visited: 9/12/2002  

  Vilma Torres, a social worker with Safe Horizon, the victims' service agency, said: "Families are reflecting on their new titles, their new identities.Widow.Single parent.Orphan. .Early this summer, weariness permeated the mourners.Many had cloaked themselves in emotional cotton just to get through the day.They declined to speak, to risk unraveling.Others were snappish. .
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  Vilma Torres, a social worker with Safe Horizon, the victims' service agency, said: "Families are reflecting on their new titles, their new identities.Widow.Single parent.Orphan. .Early this summer, weariness permeated the mourners.Many had cloaked themselves in emotional cotton just to get through the day.They declined to speak, to risk unraveling.Others were snappish. .
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  Vilma Torres, a social worker with Safe Horizon, the victims' service agency, said: "Families are reflecting on their new titles, their new identities.Widow.Single parent.Orphan. .Early this summer, weariness permeated the mourners.Many had cloaked themselves in emotional cotton just to get through the day.They declined to speak, to risk unraveling.Others were snappish. .
  ...
  Vilma Torres, a social worker with Safe Horizon, the victims' service agency, said: "Families are reflecting on their new titles, their new identities.Widow.Single parent.Orphan. .Early this summer, weariness permeated the mourners.Many had cloaked themselves in emotional cotton just to get through the day.They declined to speak, to risk unraveling.Others were snappish. .

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  It - HarlemLIVE - [Cached Version]
  Published on: 7/2/2003    Last Visited: 7/23/2009  

  Vilma Torres, a social worker at
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  Torres recommended that you choose a time "when your parents aren't busy or cranky. She also suggested that "if you see a (TV) program about it, discuss it with your parents. And if you are having sex, Torres advised, "Tell your parents before someone else does."
  ...
  information," Torres said. First, find someone else you can talk to. "Call Planned Parenthood, Mount
  
  Sinai's Adolescent Center, the Door, or get a referral from Youthline," Torres advised. Second, "Make sure it's what you want to do," Torres said.
  
  The right time to have sex is "when you're feeling mature and ready to take on the responsibility. When you want to do it, not because someone is pressuring you to do it," Torres said. And if you do decide
  
  you're ready, she added.

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  It's That Time For The Birds And The Bees - HarlemLIVE - [Cached Version]
  Published on: 12/19/2008    Last Visited: 8/20/2009  

  Vilma Torres, a social worker at
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  Torres recommended that you choose a time "when your parents aren't busy or cranky. She also suggested that "if you see a (TV) program about it, discuss it with your parents. And if you are having sex, Torres advised, "Tell your parents before someone else does."
  ...
  information," Torres said. First, find someone else you can talk to. "Call Planned Parenthood, Mount Sinai's Adolescent Center, the Door, or get a referral from Youthline," Torres advised. Second, "Make sure it's what you want to do," Torres said.
  
  The right time to have sex is "when you're feeling mature and ready to take on the responsibility. When you want to do it, not because someone is pressuring you to do it," Torres said. And if you do decide you're ready, she added.

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  New York Daily News - Boroughs - Tragedy rips girl's... - [Cached Version]
  Published on: 7/6/2004    Last Visited: 7/6/2004  

  "The last image of her mom was so horrific," said Vilma Torres, clinical director of the Family of Homicide Victims program at Safe Horizons, the victims advocacy group where Vickie attended her counseling sessions.

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  Safe Horizon In The News - [Cached Version]
  Published on: 4/11/2008    Last Visited: 8/10/2009  

  Crime victims - whether they have been assaulted, robbed, stalked or harassed - have rights, as do family members of victims, said Vilma Torres, director of homicide victims programs at Safe Horizon. They include the right to speak to the court at sentencing, be notified if the offender is released from jail and apply for financial assistance to cover funeral, medical, counseling and transportation expenses, said Torres.

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