Editorial: Cheers & Jeers -
[Cached Version]
Published on: 7/23/2002
Last Visited: 7/23/2002
CHEERS: to Plattsburgh State communications professor Justin Gustainis, who was recently rewarded for some abysmal writing.Intentionally and gloriously abysmal.He won an award in the annual Bulwer-Lytton Fiction Contest, which asks contributors to come up with a single sentence of the poorest prose they can muster.
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Gustainis won second place in the "Vile Pun" category with this: "The giant ape's broken body lay upon the asphalt, and I didn't know which had finally done him in - the planes' machine guns, the fall from atop the building or maybe just a broken heart - but it was all so heart-wrenching, so tragic, his climbing the Empire State Building just to get a glimpse of that woman's gorgeous derriere, and the sheer waste of it finally prompted me to pronounce my own benediction over his great, furry carcass: ‘‘Twas booty killed the beast!'" Gustainis writes fiction as a hobby.Most of it's not bad at all.